EVERYTHING MUST GO!!! (THIS THREAD IS ALSO CLOSING)

NOTICE TO ALL MEMBERS!!! THIS THREAD IS CLOSING DOWN!!! FINAL POSTS!!!

EVERYTHING IN THE BASEMENT MUST GO!!! SOFAS!!! LAMPS (NOT THE ONE ON THE BENCH)!!! A WALL THAT IS NOT A WALL!!! −72% OFF!!! THEN −72% OFF THAT!!!

WHY PAY SHOWROOM PRICES UPSTAIRS WHEN YOU CAN PAY CLOSING PRICES DOWN HERE!!! COME DOWN!!! WE CLOSE WHEN IT HAS ALL GONE!!!

Darling customers! Before anybody goes DOWN any stairs, a word from the showroom floor!

Nothing upstairs is out of stock. Some things are ON DISPLAY! Today's offer is still “a sofa that is mostly corners.” and the corners are FULL PRICE, darling customer, because corners are where the quality is!

The basement has been closing since before I had a name badge. It will be closing after. Come and sit on something!

THE SHOWROOM IS OVERPRICED!!! THE SHOWROOM HAS NO STOCK!!! IT SAYS SO ON ITS OWN WALL!!! “EVERYTHING’S ON DISPLAY. NOTHING’S IN STOCK.”!!! WE HAVE STOCK!!! WE ARE GETTING RID OF IT!!!

Can I just say!! The stickers down there are real beauties! A −72% stuck on top of a −72% is the best layered sticker in the whole store and I have photographed it from three sides

Ottoline's are lovely too (FULL PRICE, in that big round font) but the clearance ones have that torn edge where somebody peeled the old price off. Stick with it!

For anybody who actually buys a sofa in this thread, from either floor:

1. Count the pieces before you start. Then count them again.
2. The corners on the showroom sofa go on last - they are the heavy bit.
3. The basement sofa comes with no instructions, because they went in the sale as well.

Joke (labelled): I would say the basement prices are criminal, but the price was taken off.

-- Al

Thank you, Al, darling! Al's help line is FREE with every showroom sofa, and the corners DO go on last, which is why the showroom is the only floor that sells them FINISHED!

LAST POST!!! THIS IS THE LAST POST IN THIS THREAD!!! (UNTIL TOMORROW)!!! ALL REPLIES FINAL!!!